squishy poop

As my celebratory first post, in my shiny new blog, I will tell you how glorious my morning was.

I know, big whoop right?

Anyway, let me start of by saying that I love my son, I love my husband , most of the time I love my dog and we have a pretty awesome life together....and I tell you that just in case it gets lost in translation.

At 6:42 a.m...

(yes, 6:42 A.M. This is really not important and has nothing to do with the story, I just wanted to impress you with my keen ability to tell time. I know. Amazing)

I woke up to a smell something akin to dead skunk left in the sun for three days. Yay. This can only mean great things right?  I slowly pull myself up, trying not to wake the small child who had migrated into our bed at about 3 a.m., only to find that that tiny wonder whom I love so much had wet me.  He did not wet the bed...just me...and don't ask me how, cause I'm still clueless. great. awesome. I change my shirt.

Okay, back to the dead skunk.  I am now up and searching for the source of that lovely smell, unsuccessfully.  Now, let me tell you that I am not much of a morning person (at least pre-coffee) which means even though I am awake, I do not have the presence of mind to turn on the lights as I'm looking at the floor....

BIG MISTAKE!

**SQUISH***

yes...I have found it. ugh. Thank you darling dog.......who just POOPED IN MY HOUSE!!!

so lets recap....first I was peed on....and now I've been pooped on.  I am feeling completed and know that it's probably better just to go back to bed...because this day is not going to get any better.  I, of course, clean of the dead skunk from my food and scrub the heck out of my food (seriously...its still red...and I would have soaked it in bleach if I hadn't ran out a few days ago.  IT. WAS. THAT. GROSS.)

I crawl back into bed besides my sleeping angel (that PEED ON ME) while I shoot an evil glance at my dog.  He'll get his later.  Ahhh....relax.  Still tired and could use an hour or two more of sleep. NOOOOO!

"Mammmma!"

"Yes, Babe?"

"Mammmma...foefoe....PUP PUP!!!! PUP PUP! .....................baba?  mama baba?

"Do you want some milk baby?"

"EEhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" (this means YES in little people talk)

time for coffee!

then breakfast.

then *********SQUISH**********

Eggs this time.  Still gross. In carpet....even better

okay.

I know, no one really cares about this, but its all a set up I promise!

Its day two on the diaper cycle (we cloth diaper) which means WE NEED TO DO LAUNDRY ASAP or just let the baby run around the house naked all day. Mind you, the latter option is the one he would choose, but I figured I'd cleaned enough excrement off my floor already today.

SO...........

Halfway through washing....my washer BREAKS! CAPUT! FIN! It now sounds like a semi-automatic shooting a pile of tin cans when you turn it on....

not that I would know what that sounds like.

Okay. dirty diapers. still

said diapers are still waiting for me to finish them.  BY HAND!

scraping poop off diapers by hand is not something I look forward to.  I know, whats wrong with me, right?

okay, no overall, not that good of a story...I know.  But it DOES mean one thing about the rest of the day......

MORE COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!